Let $p$ and $q$ be positive integers (whole numbers). In the fraction $\frac{p}{q}$, the numbers $p$ and $q$ play distinct roles:
$q$ measures the "size" of (or denominates) $\frac{1}{q}$. Intuitively, $\frac{1}{q}$ is the quantity obtained by dividing one unit into $q$ equal portions. For example, $\frac{1}{2}$ represents the result of dividing $1$ into two equal portions; $\frac{1}{3}$ results from dividing $1$ into three equal portions; and so forth. Sometimes we even read "$\frac{1}{q}$" as "$1$ divided by $q$", as in "one unit divided into $q$ equal portions".
$p$ tells you "how many portions" of size $\frac{1}{q}$ make up $\frac{p}{q}$. That is, $p$ numerates the fraction.
A rule such as $\frac{2}{7} + \frac{3}{7} = \frac{5}{7}$ holds because two of some quantity (here $\frac{1}{7}$) added to three of that same quantity gives five units of the quantity.
A rule such as $\frac{4}{14} = \frac{2}{7}$ holds for a reason a little complicated to say in words: If fourteen units of some quantity make one unit and seven units of another quantity make one unit, then four units of the first quantity equal two units of the second quantity. Here, we have twice as many portions of a quantity half as large.
Yogi Berra was once asked, "Do you want your pizza cut into six pieces or eight?" He replied, "Better make it six. I could never eat eight pieces of pizza." Now you can spoil the joke by explaining it mathematically: $\frac{6}{6} = \frac{8}{8}$.
Finally we come to the question: Why is $\frac{1}{a + b}$ not equal to $\frac{1}{a} + \frac{1}{b}$? As user2357112 notes, a "better" first question to ask might be the skeptical one, "Why are they (or why should they be) equal?" The preceding paragraphs explain why, if $p$, $p'$, $q$, and $k$ are positive integers, then
$$
\frac{p}{q} + \frac{p'}{q} = \frac{p + p'}{q},\qquad
\frac{kp}{kq} = \frac{p}{q}.
$$
Each rule (or "theorem") comes down to counting, possibly counting different numbers of units of different size.
Now, the fraction $\frac{1}{a + b}$ represents an amount, $(a + b)$ portions of which make one unit.
The expression $\frac{1}{a} + \frac{1}{b}$ represents an agglomeration of two quantities: An amount, $a$ portions of which make one unit, and an amount, $b$ portions of which make one unit.
These cannot represent the same quantity if $a$ and $b$ are positive integers: The larger the denominator, the smaller the denominated portion, because a larger number of portions are needed to make one unit (Yogi Berra's pizza slices). In symbols, we might express the argument as
$$
\frac{1}{a + b} < \frac{1}{a} < \frac{1}{a} + \frac{1}{b}.
$$
And as you've noticed, $\frac{1}{a + b} \neq \frac{1}{a} + \frac{1}{b}$ in examples. It's effectively because the denominator measures the sizes of portions, while addition expresses agglomeration of portions of fixed size.
Since we've come this far: What is $\frac{1}{a} + \frac{1}{b}$ as a single fraction? If $a \neq b$, we're "adding apples and oranges", i.e., trying to agglomerate amounts in different systems of measurement, like adding $2$ inches to $4$ centimeters. To proceed, we need to express each quantity in terms of a common denominator, as it were. One way to do this is to cross-multiply and then count the total number of portions:
$$
\frac{1}{a} + \frac{1}{b} = \frac{b}{ab} + \frac{a}{ab} = \frac{a + b}{ab}.
$$
By similar reasoning, you can justify the general addition formula:
$$
\frac{p}{q} + \frac{p'}{q'} = \frac{pq' + p'q}{qq'}.
$$