There are three kinds of 2-tensors, of type $(0,2)$, $(2,0)$ and $(1,1)$.
Let's take the metric tensor $g$ of type $(0,2)$.
If $p$ is a point in your manifold and $V:=T_p M$ the tangential space as a vectorspace, then the metric is a bilinear map
$$
g_p:V \times V \rightarrow \mathbb{R}
$$
and "the matrix" of $g$ is a description of $g$ if you choose a basis $e_1,\dots ,e_4$ (which usually is $\partial_1|_p,...\partial_4|_p$ in a coordinate system) of $V$. This matrix is defined by
$$
g_{ij}|_p = g_p(e_i,e_j) \qquad g_{ij} = g(e_i,e_j)
$$
(most of the time one ignores $p$ and thinks about functions of $p$ in a coordinate system)
So:
Yes, your matrix is an appropriate way of writing a metric tensor
Yes, every matrix IS a 2-tensor (always "in" a coordinate sytem) BUT
this matrix depends on the choosen basis. And the other types of 2-tensors are bilinear maps
$$
V \times V^* \rightarrow \mathbb{R} \quad \text{and} \quad V^* \times V^* \rightarrow \mathbb{R}
$$
(where $V^*$ is the dual space of $V$ = the $1-$forms = covectors = dual vectors = covariant vectors,etc) which can also be described by a matrix as long as you choose a basis for $V$ and $V^*$. This different kinds are indicated by index placement
$$
g^i_j \quad \text{and} \quad g^{ij}
$$
but in our case these things "are" ordinary $4\times 4$-matrices over $\mathbb R$.
Fact: if you have a matrix, you must "know" the type of the tensor if you want to produce a tensor from this matrix
Where does the confusion come from:
$g$ is non-degenerate, which means $g(v,w)=0$ for all $w$ implies $v=0$
which is equivalent to
$$
V \rightarrow V^* \qquad v \mapsto g(v,-)
$$
beeing an isomorphism. So $g$ identifies $V$ and $V^*$ and this isomorphism is implicit if in physics one speaks of an $2-$tensor without mentioning it's type. Because you can now identify
$$
\operatorname{Bil}(V\times V,\mathbb R)=
\operatorname{Bil}(V\times V^*,\mathbb R)=
\operatorname{Bil}(V^*\times V^*,\mathbb R)
$$